2 Timothy 3:16
All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.
It is very difficult to truly love ourselves if God is not at the center of our lives, meeting our deepest needs.
Counseling Is Aligned with the Following Beliefs
Our Deepest Needs
Foundationally, each of us have four core needs (i.e., acceptance, identity, security, and purpose) that only can be met by God. Understanding this is essential. If, however, we fail to let God meet these deepest needs in us we will subconsciously project them onto others in an attempt to have them satisfy these needs for us which they are incapable of doing. This often leads to unrealistic expectations of others, a life of resentment, chronic disappointment, and our ability to give may become dependent on what we get from others.
In order to find peace and fulfillment, we need to start by making God the center of our lives and relationships. Trying to get others to satisfy these core needs (or trying to fill the void of these unmet needs with something else) is often the root cause of addictions, failed relationships, depression, abuse, chronic anger, codependency, narcissism, eating disorders, and so on.
“I am loved and accepted for who I am” (Romans 8:35-39). When we seek to have our need for acceptance met by another person we will seek validation from others and will be let down. This can lead to us feeling rejected and bitter. God is the only one who knows everything about us and will always love and accept His children.
"I am special, unique, and significant” (Psalm 139). When we know our identity in God we can truly love ourselves and others the way God loves us. God is the only one who knows why each of us were created. Those who have their need for identity fulfilled by God know they are special, unique, and a child of God.
“I am safe and secure from harm” (Psalm 91). When we have God's security in us it is easy to be at peace no matter what is happening around us. God is the only one who can make us feel truly safe and secure.
“I have a significant purpose and there is a reason for my life” (Jeremiah 29:11-14). When we feel a lack of purpose in our lives it can lead to such things as anger, addictions, and depression. God has a purpose and reason for each of our lives. Our true purpose will align with God's will and have something to do with serving others in truth and love.
Source: Paraphrased from Marriage on The Rock Couple’s Workbook, by Jimmy Evans