Module 2: Core Skills & Counseling Basics
This module is an awareness builder, designed to provide a deeper understanding of what it takes to become a great counselor. A counselor provides comfort, support, encouragement, direction, correction, guidance, and accountability to others. When individuals are at the point of needing counseling, they are often stressed, confused, overwhelmed, worried, depressed, and/or scared. This can make it difficult for them to focus and think clearly. For this reason, it is also a counselor's role to provide the sound mind that clients need to think through productive solutions. The overarching goal of counseling is to create a safe environment in which clients can process through their innermost thoughts and emotions and arrive at new strategies for sustainable change.
Your responsibility as an effective counselor is to maintain a judgement-free space while actively listening to clients and engaging them in processing through potential solutions based on biblical truth. It is not your responsibility to tell your clients what they should or should not do. Clients are responsible for making their own decisions. Instead, the main focus should be to empower your clients to process through their challenges in healthier, more rational, functional ways so that they can arrive at healthy solutions on their own.
To complete this module:
Your responsibility as an effective counselor is to maintain a judgement-free space while actively listening to clients and engaging them in processing through potential solutions based on biblical truth. It is not your responsibility to tell your clients what they should or should not do. Clients are responsible for making their own decisions. Instead, the main focus should be to empower your clients to process through their challenges in healthier, more rational, functional ways so that they can arrive at healthy solutions on their own.
To complete this module:
- Review each of the below must-have core attributes, habits, and disciplines for counselors.
- Build yourself up in any of these areas where you may need more development.
- Do your best to discipline yourself to 1) read at least one chapter in your Bible daily, and 2) once a week watch one video teaching from the recommended Bible teachers listed below.
Be a Great Listener
This is the most important thing you can offer your clients! It is very healing for someone to feel truly heard and understood. Being able to "hold space" for clients where they can honestly share their thoughts and feelings is the most valuable gift you can give them. The unfortunate truth is most people are poor listeners making it difficult for many to find a friend, family member, or co-worker to confide in. Therefore, don't underestimate how powerful being an active listener is for someone. More than the advice you give your clients, actively listening to them in a safe space is a powerfully supportive experience and is the most important thing you are giving them.
Active listening in a counseling session means:
Active listening in a counseling session means:
- Taking notes as your client is speaking,
- Listening with your heart; being able to "hear" the other person's heart through their words,
- Breathing as your client is speaking (this will help you stay focused and grounded), and
- Being fully present with your client (people can "feel" when they are being actively listened to).
Be Organized
When people are struggling with anxiety, depression, rejection, abuse, addiction, and so on, their environments and lives often become very disorganized. Therefore, as the counselor, it is important that you present a good example by being well organized and on time for sessions. This will help your clients feel that you are someone they can rely on. To this end, it is important to use a reliable calendar system for scheduling your client sessions. It is also recommended that you utilize a contact management tool for maintaining all client contact information and documenting session notes. Microsoft Outlook is recommended for both the calendar system and contact management tool.
Please have your calendar system and contact management tool established before moving on to Training Module 3. If organization is an area of challenge for you, then spend some time improving this area of your life before starting your counseling ministry. If you need further support in this area, please reach out via the form below.
Please have your calendar system and contact management tool established before moving on to Training Module 3. If organization is an area of challenge for you, then spend some time improving this area of your life before starting your counseling ministry. If you need further support in this area, please reach out via the form below.
Practice Self-Care
Balance and boundaries are important to cultivate as a counselor. Maintaining a healthy diet, getting plenty of sleep, exercising, spending time with your family, reading your Bible, and so on will be essential disciplines for you. This includes not overscheduling yourself with too many clients and having plenty of down time to take care of yourself. For this reason, it is recommended that you book no more than 4 clients per day (or less, if needed). As a counselor, you need to give out of an abundance of what you have, not what you don't have. If you can't care for yourself, then you won't be able to care well for others. In other words, you need to "walk the walk". To encourage others to love themselves well and practice self-care, you will need to have this in place for yourself first.
This includes giving yourself permission to not work with clients you don't want to work with. You are not obligated to take on every person as a client who reaches out for help. If you get a bad vibe from someone, if there is something that makes you uncomfortable, or you don't think the person is ready for counseling you can choose to not work with that person as a client. There will always be people with problems who need help, so be careful not to fall into the trap of thinking that it is your responsibility to "save" or "rescue" everyone who reaches out to you.
Additionally, if you notice a client is not putting in the time and effort needed for change, gradually ramp down sessions with him or her. For example, you may notice such a client will not complete homework, will miss or reschedule multiple sessions, or will keep discussing issues that have already been resolved in session. Sometimes people want a "friend" more than they want counseling. Therefore, be mindful not to invest your valuable time and energy in those who show they are not ready, or willing, to put in the effort to achieve the goals and change they claim to want.
As you progress through this training, begin practicing more self-care in your life. Be sure you are setting necessary boundaries and carving out enough time for rest, reading, and rejuvenating yourself with proper nutrition, sunlight, pure water, healthy relationships, and the word of God.
This includes giving yourself permission to not work with clients you don't want to work with. You are not obligated to take on every person as a client who reaches out for help. If you get a bad vibe from someone, if there is something that makes you uncomfortable, or you don't think the person is ready for counseling you can choose to not work with that person as a client. There will always be people with problems who need help, so be careful not to fall into the trap of thinking that it is your responsibility to "save" or "rescue" everyone who reaches out to you.
Additionally, if you notice a client is not putting in the time and effort needed for change, gradually ramp down sessions with him or her. For example, you may notice such a client will not complete homework, will miss or reschedule multiple sessions, or will keep discussing issues that have already been resolved in session. Sometimes people want a "friend" more than they want counseling. Therefore, be mindful not to invest your valuable time and energy in those who show they are not ready, or willing, to put in the effort to achieve the goals and change they claim to want.
As you progress through this training, begin practicing more self-care in your life. Be sure you are setting necessary boundaries and carving out enough time for rest, reading, and rejuvenating yourself with proper nutrition, sunlight, pure water, healthy relationships, and the word of God.
Pull From Your Life Experience
Successful counselors have valuable life experience that they can pull from. The more life experience you have, the more you will be able to relate to your clients, and vice versa. Life can teach us much more than any book or class can. You will notice that many of the clients you work with will be struggling with similar challenges that you have had to work through yourself. Keep in mind, you will not be able to effectively counsel another in an area of challenge where you are still currently bound. For example, if you are struggling with unforgiveness, you will not want to counsel others who are also struggling with unforgiveness.
If you discover that there is an area of struggle where you are still bound, then you will need to break free from this bondage before ministering to someone else in this same area of bondage. Scripture addresses this in Matthew 7:3-5, “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye."
Another reason this is important is because if you are speaking with a client about an issue that you are still struggling with yourself, it can "trigger" you when you are in a session. As a counselor, you need to remain neutral and grounded in sessions. You are to be there for your clients by holding space for them, and this will be difficult for you do if you get emotionally triggered.
If you discover that there is an area of struggle where you are still bound, then you will need to break free from this bondage before ministering to someone else in this same area of bondage. Scripture addresses this in Matthew 7:3-5, “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye."
Another reason this is important is because if you are speaking with a client about an issue that you are still struggling with yourself, it can "trigger" you when you are in a session. As a counselor, you need to remain neutral and grounded in sessions. You are to be there for your clients by holding space for them, and this will be difficult for you do if you get emotionally triggered.
Know Who You Are
Being grounded in your identity "in Christ" is a must for a Christian counselor. This is a main area of attack by the enemy. The enemy knows that if we are ignorant of, or confused about, who we are (according to the scriptures), then it will cause a lot of damage and turmoil in our lives. Often times the root cause of mental and emotional challenges is people not really knowing who they are. Unbelievers and believers alike struggle with identity issues, and this is due to an ignorance of, or a lack of belief in, the scriptures. For this reason, before you begin counseling others, it is critical that you are grounded in your identity "in Christ".
Begin by asking yourself this question, as a believer: Who am I?
Do you struggle to answer this question? If yes, then it means you need to gain more understanding about who you are "in Christ". If you are having trouble answering this question, please reach out via the form below and support will be provided to build you up in this area.
Begin by asking yourself this question, as a believer: Who am I?
Do you struggle to answer this question? If yes, then it means you need to gain more understanding about who you are "in Christ". If you are having trouble answering this question, please reach out via the form below and support will be provided to build you up in this area.
Genuinely Care About Others
The heart of a counselor rejoices to see others restored and set free from bondage. Counselors genuinely care about each client they work with. When you sincerely care about those you work with, they will be able to feel it and that is a very healing experience. Remember, some people have never felt genuine love and care from another person before. In this way, you are able to share the love of Christ with them in an experiential way. Now, while it is important to deeply and authentically care about the healing and success of your clients, it is also critical not to get so emotionally "drawn in" during a session that you become emotionally overwhelmed or overly invested. You will need to remain detached enough during each session so that your emotions don't get the best of you.
Throughout your work as a counselor, you will hear some terrible, traumatic, shocking, cruel, and painful stories from your clients. It is essential that you are able to hold a safe space for them where you "observe the conversation" but do not get pulled in so much that you break down emotionally. If you do start to feel emotionally overwhelmed in a session, take a few deep breaths and pull yourself back to being the "distant observer". As your client is sharing his or her story, think of yourself as someone who is watching a movie, and remain emotionally detached as you listen. Don't "take on" your client's pain or become overly empathetic; instead, you can share your compassion by saying, "That must have been really difficult for you, and I'm sorry that happened to you."
Throughout your work as a counselor, you will hear some terrible, traumatic, shocking, cruel, and painful stories from your clients. It is essential that you are able to hold a safe space for them where you "observe the conversation" but do not get pulled in so much that you break down emotionally. If you do start to feel emotionally overwhelmed in a session, take a few deep breaths and pull yourself back to being the "distant observer". As your client is sharing his or her story, think of yourself as someone who is watching a movie, and remain emotionally detached as you listen. Don't "take on" your client's pain or become overly empathetic; instead, you can share your compassion by saying, "That must have been really difficult for you, and I'm sorry that happened to you."
Study the Word Daily
As a Christian counselor, you need to know the scriptures. Your knowledge and understanding of biblical truth is what sets you apart from a secular counselor. Therefore, you will need to study daily. This can include teachings from biblical teachers and pastors, but you must touch the word of God daily. A love for God's word is something all believers have, but sometimes we can become lazy when it comes to reading and studying the scriptures. As a counselor in ministry, this is not an option for you.
Your clients are counting on you for biblical direction, so you must know the scriptures and know them rightly divided. You don't want to spread false teachings or misguide others. We are commanded in 2 Timothy 2:15 to, "Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." Also, please be sure you use a King James Bible when ministering to clients.
If you are not familiar with right division (i.e., reading the Bible in proper context), start by watching the following video teachings and use the chart below as a reference:
Your clients are counting on you for biblical direction, so you must know the scriptures and know them rightly divided. You don't want to spread false teachings or misguide others. We are commanded in 2 Timothy 2:15 to, "Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." Also, please be sure you use a King James Bible when ministering to clients.
If you are not familiar with right division (i.e., reading the Bible in proper context), start by watching the following video teachings and use the chart below as a reference:
- Rightly Dividing the Word of Truth by Justin Johnson
- Rightly Dividing the Word of Truth by Donnie Holt
- Right Division Overview by David Reid
Right Division Chart
Below is a listing of recommended pastors and Bible teachers to help you study:
For women, we have a weekly Women's Bible Study every Tuesday and Thursday night. This is another great way to keep you in God's word weekly.
If you have any questions regarding the Bible or how best to study it, please feel free to reach out with your questions using the form below.
- Shorewood Bible Church - Richard Jordan
- Grace Ambassadors - Justin Johnson
- Grace For Today Bible Fellowship - Donnie Holt
- Hillview Baptist Church - Paul Lucas
- Columbus Bible Church - David Reid
- Right Divider - Eric Neumann
For women, we have a weekly Women's Bible Study every Tuesday and Thursday night. This is another great way to keep you in God's word weekly.
If you have any questions regarding the Bible or how best to study it, please feel free to reach out with your questions using the form below.
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